A Special Issue Of Dover’s World “Out For Good Hero”
While it’s customary for me to only name one “Out For Good Hero” each month, I actually missed one in September this year and, therefore, am very pleased to announce I have not just one, but two more Heroes for December, my Mom and Dad, Herb and Jean Dover. They are both extraordinary people who have had their own careers while also being parents who have raised a great family and done so many things for so many people over the decades, they are too numerous to mention. Suffice it to say that my folks are still giving to many charities and doing their best to help out those less fortunate, even as they cope with their own health problems.
It just so happens that both my father, Herb, and my Mom, Jean, have birthdays this month. My Dad’s is the 21st and my Mom is a New Year’s baby! He will be 86 and my Mom 82. What makes their birthdays more special is that he has Alzheimer’s now which began to appear about the same time as my Mom’s second breast cancer returned in 2003. That event began a roller coaster ride for us all which has now gone on for close to 7 years, six and two-thirds of which my Mom was not even supposed to be around for, from what we were told at the time.
That’s right - my Mom was given 3 months to live 7 years ago! Since then she has gone in and out of miraculous remissions while taking care of my Dad who himself hashad both good and bad times as his health diminished. For a long time each could help the other to be strong where the one was weak, but as time has marched on, both have needed more help and I am very glad that Robert and I as well as my siblings have had the ability to be there for them, just as they were always there 100% for us.
If anyone thinks getting older is at all easy, they are probably under 30! All I can say for sure is that my Mom and Dad show more courage and class every day as they proceed on their journey through this phase of their lives than I can even imagine myself ever having . My Mom always reminds me, “None of us are getting out of this one alive”. She has no fear of what happens after we pass, and my Dad, who is right now babysitting (along with his care-taker) my dog, Simon, while my Mom and I are having the cancer in her eyes checked to see if the drugs are working, is always pretty happy in the moment, although each may seem a new one for him. And after a long day with the specialist, I am very pleased to report that my Mom’s eyes are under control which means the chemo is doing its job, thank God! On to thinking about birthday parties for each of them - a very good thing!
So, I am a very lucky son and with pride and love I very appropriately name my folks, Herb and Jean Dover, as my “Special Out For Good Heroes” for December!
Love,
Robert
Marci Brown — December 15, 2009 @ 10:22 pm
Your Mom is fantastic ! I couldn’t agree more with your choice of heros !
Kelly — December 15, 2009 @ 11:16 pm
Your devotion to and recognition of your parents is very touching. Thank you for the beautiful reminder that there are role models of all ages–what an inspiration.
Bernie Hewitt — December 16, 2009 @ 4:34 am
Wholly appropriate Robert. Will especially think of your Dad on his birthday as it’s mine too but will drink a toast to Robert’s Mom and Dad. Cheers to courage and class!
Christie Hanson — December 16, 2009 @ 9:16 am
Bravo! And Happy Birthday to two wonderful people!
Jessica — December 16, 2009 @ 12:44 pm
I was so excited to log in and see this on the front page of your website! I couldn’t agree more. While I obviously have conversed with your mom and not your dad, I can tell you that you have two very special parents! Happy Birthday to both! Your mom has been an inspiration to me and a shoulder to cry on during what has become the most emotional and harrowing year of my life. She’s passed along things you’ve said to her as well that have reminded me that I should be living for the moments that I do have and enjoying every one of them. This holiday season I am not only blessed to still have my mom with me, but also to call your mom a friend! Cheers to her and Herb! Love Jessica
Jessica — December 16, 2009 @ 12:45 pm
and pardon the grammatical errors… it’s been a long week!
Jane Savoie — December 16, 2009 @ 4:08 pm
Yup!…Courage and Class. Robert, you couldn’t have picked two better heroes.
Herb and Jean…I love you both so much. You’re two of the most special people I’ve ever known.
Happy Birthdays!
Your “adopted” daughter, Jane
John Posey — December 16, 2009 @ 5:38 pm
What a handsome couple your parents are! That was a very loving tribute to them both. I also am very lucky to have both my parents still and to have had a continuous loving environment in which to grow and feel secure and comfortable being myself from my earliest childhood to this very day! Best to you and your family for the Holidays!–and Happy Birthdays to your Mother and Father! xx John
Jean Dover — December 16, 2009 @ 8:46 pm
Dearest Robert,
Dearest Precious Son,
Thank you so very much for making us your heroes for December. Of course the thrill of reading that made me cry which you know I do when ever I am happy.
You know Robert you are our hero 365 days a year. I wish you were twins!
To all of you who wished us well, thank you so much from both of us.
Berni, Happy Birthday, and may all your special dreams come true. Don’t forget you have a shirt coming.
Life is sweet. Live it up while you may.
Lovingly.
Robert’s Mom
Jean Dover — December 16, 2009 @ 8:49 pm
Please excuse the double opening. I am tired and anxious to watch So You Think You Can Dance.
Jean Dover — December 21, 2009 @ 9:00 pm
Herb had a lovely birthday today though he couldn’t remember he was having one. I kept reminding him as all the calls & cards came in.
To our faithful friends out there thank you for your comments we love to receive. You have all become very special to me.
May Christmas bring you perfect health, peace of mind, and enough time to enjoy both.
For the planet we all share may there be Peace on Earth, and Good Will Towards All Mankind.
Love,
Robert’s Mom
Jean Dover — December 28, 2009 @ 10:41 am
Well here we are just a few short days until 2009 is history. I don’t think many people will miss it. May 2010 be kinder to all of mankind. When will countries learn peace is more productive then war, and kindness beats killing every time.
As for me, I am thrilled I will really turn 82 at eleven PM. the 31st. That means I have lived 82 years, and am starting on my 83rd!
Have a joyous New Years.
When you are all rested up please let me know about yours.
Lovingly,
Robert’s Mom
Kim — August 29, 2010 @ 12:25 pm
Oh, somehow I missed this. What a lovely tribute!
Candace — April 10, 2011 @ 7:30 pm
I love your mom’s column! Your parents must be very proud of you, for sure, but I think the feeling is mutual.
Sari Hewlett-Pacheco — December 7, 2011 @ 12:49 am
Robert, your parents health touches a very dear and real life issue with my parents. I thank the Lord her eyes are ok. Enjoy every moment, have patience when you think you could find anymore, have strength when you are so tired you want to sleep, and the love you have for these 2 special people will carry you when you can no longer stand. I wish more people could realize what a gem their parents are and enjoy doing things with them and sometimes just hanging with them. Live, love, laugh and enjoy, God sent you to these 2 great people and they are blessed to have you for their son!